Welcome to the Wednesday Joke Roundup! Every week, we’ll be bringing you an array of hilarious jokes sure to make your day brighter. Whether you’re looking for a few chuckles in the morning or some lighthearted ribbing with friends late at night, these daily doses of comedy are the perfect way to liven up any situation.

  1. Why is the d silent in Wednesday? Cause on hump day you’re already getting the D.
  2. On a Saturday, how do you make a blonde laugh? You tell her a joke on Wednesday.
  3. What ruins a Wednesday night? The fact that it is still a hump day!
  4. What’s the difference between you and a Calendar? Hump day comes once a week.
  5. What do you call when it’s not raining on Wednesday? Simply, dry hump day.
  6. What was the camel’s favorite day of the week? Wednesday – because it’s Hump Day!
  7. Why do we tell actors to ‘break a leg’? Because every play has a cast.
  8. If you are a 90s kid-you say I love my gaming system! Your friend says Then why don’t you marry it? You say Super! I will! What day is this scenario most likely to occur? WEDNESDAY
  9. How do Ash Wednesdays inspire New Years? They help you to stay strong and give up on new year resolutions as a sacrifice.
  10. What does it mean when you wake up on Wednesday morning? That you made it though another Tuesday!
  11. How do you know that weddings on a Wednesday are sad? When you see the cake is in tiers too.
  12. Why was the man happy about Ash Wednesday? Because he wished to give up his work for lent.
  13. How do you keep a bagel from getting away? Put lox on it.
  14. What did the tree say to Wednesday? Please, leaf me alone.
  15. What do Wednesdays’ dream of becoming? They only dream and wish of becoming Thursdays.
  16. What did the shark say when he ate the clownfish? This tastes a little funny.
  17. Why did the Addams have the late man arrested? He was expected on Tuesday, but he came on Wednesday.
  18. Why do most Americans spend Wednesday in the office? Because “White Men Can’t Hump”.
  19. How do you make up for coming late to work on a Wednesday? By leaving early, perhaps?
  20. Why are Sundays stronger than Wednesdays? Because Wednesday is a week day.
  21. This is the third time you’ve been late to work this week. Do you know what that means? It’s Wednesday?
  22. What is even worse than a long week? Realizing that it is just Wednesday.
  23. How does Yoda get through Wednesday ?By saying, “Half over the week is now!”
  24. What do camels sing on karaoke night? My hump, my hump, my hump (ha), my lovely lady lumps
  25. It if’s Wednesday, but it’s not raining, does that make it dry hump day?
  26. What are Wednesdays with no rain called? Parched hump days.
  27. Why did the woman cry on a Wednesday evening? Because she thought it was whine Wednesday.
  28. Why don’t they have Drivers Ed on Wednesday in the Middle East? It wears out the camel.
  29. Why are Superman’s powers useless on Wednesday evenings? Because he goes to his weekly Bitcoin meeting and it’s his crypto-night.
  30. When’s the last time Christina Ricci was cute? Wednesday.
  31. Why did the man have an un-inviting face in office? Because it was his Monday-Tuesday-Wednesday face.
  32. What kind of bread do you eat on Wednesday? Hump-ernickel.
  33. What do you call a camel with no hump on a Wednesday? Hum-phrey!
  34. Why are Wednesdays boring for the first half of the week? Because they bring smiles only for the second half of the week.
  35. What did the left eye say to the right eye? Between you and me, something smells.
  36. How does Adele greet Wednesday from a Sunday? “Hello from the other side of the week!”
  37. What do you call Wednesdays at the gym for pirates? Peg day
  38. Why didn’t ‘Mean Girls’ wear black on Wednesday? Because they say, “We wear pink on Wednesdays”.
  39. What day creates the most alternative energy? Winds-Day.
  40. A woman implanted an advanced artificial intelligence into her old Nintendo gaming system so she could legally marry it. When did they get married? On Wednesday
  41. What did the girl say when she had too much homework on Wednesday? This is the Monday-est Wednesday ever!
  42. When is the ideal day to have camel meat? Wednesday.
  43. What did the nervous vampire ask every night? When’s day…
  44. How do you know that weddings on a Wednesday are sad? When you see the cake is in tiers too.
  45. What are Wednesdays like? They are just Mondays in the mid-week.
  46. What do you get when you cross Wednesday with a truck? Humpty Dumpty.
  47. Why didn’t the French chef realize it was pancake Wednesday? It Crêpe’d up on him.
  48. What is it that will help get over the hump? A smile with an extra cup of coffee!
  49. How do all the animals react to Hump day? They try to avoid the camel all day long.
  50. Why did the man cross Wednesday? To reach the weekend.
  51. On which day of the week is it legal to marry the 8-bit Nintend console? Wednesday.
  52. Why was the couple getting married today? Because it’s Weds-Day.
  53. Why didn’t Pugsley’s sister ever compete in races? Because Tuesday always came before Wednesday.
  54. What is hump day like for the working parents? A Wednesday that never leaves them alone with never-ending work.
  55. What normally comes after Taco Tuesday? Wipe-it Wednesday.
  56. Why isn’t Wednesday the saddest day of the week? Because 3 days later is a sadder day.
  57. What is the only thing employees are certain about on Wednesday? That there soon will come Friday!
  58. Why was the man happy about Ash Wednesday? Because he wished to give up his work for Lent.
  59. Why did Weeknd and Wednesday Addams break up? They were unable to sort their days together.
  60. What is the best day of the week to write a story? Pensday.
  61. What do cows do on Wednesday nights? Go to the mooooooovies.
  62. What is the good and bad thing about Wednesday? It is not Monday!
  63. How long does it take from Sunday to Wednesday? Twosday.
  64. What day of the week does Barbie make her boyfriend his favorite dinner? Kensday.
  65. Why would the alcoholic reject grapes on Wine Wednesday? Well, he is not used to consuming wine in pill form.
  66. Why couldn’t I get an appointment at the library for Wednesday? They were all booked up.
  67. Where do camels go after dinner on Wednesday? Straight for the desert trolley.
  68. Why did Thomas the Tank Engine stop working on Wednesday? He ran out of steam…
  69. What do you call a camel that cries midweek? A humpback-wail.
  70. What did the Iceberg say to the Romaine on Wednesday? Lettuce celebrate!
  71. What is a camel kid’s favorite nursery rhyme for Wednesday? Hump-ty Dumpty.
  72. When does Wednesday start with a “T”? When it’s Today or Tomorrow.
  73. Going through a week really isn’t as hard as they say it is.Once you get over the hump, the rest is easy.
  74. What day of the week do chickens lay the most eggs? Hens-day.
  75. When should one take out his girlfriend who is a bin lady? Any day among Wednesday or Thursday.
  76. What day of the week do polar bears clean their home? Densday.
  77. How does Brett Favre pronounce Wednesday? Wednesday
  78. Why did the employee get a camel in the office building? Because the boss said, ‘Bring in the hump day’.
  79. Wednesday and Thursday were named after the Norse Gods Odin and Thor… And if you really enjoy facts about Norse Gods then today is your Loki-day!
  80. What’s the worst part about Friday afternoons? Realizing it’s just Wednesday.
  81. The wife’s panties are labeled ‘Monday’, ‘Tuesday’, ‘Wednesday’ …The husband’s underwear is labeled ‘January’, February’, ‘March’…
  82. People always told my dad that his pride would be the death of himand sure enough, he was eaten by his favorite lion just last Wednesday
  83. The Pope is handing out miracles to kids. Billy walks on stage and asks him, “Can you help me with my hearing?” The Pope says “Yes” and puts his hand on Billy’s ears and prays. He removes his hands and asks, “How is your hearing now?”Billy says, “I don’t know, it’s not until next Wednesday …”
  84. How are Mondays and Wednesdays similar? Well, Wednesdays are like Monday but just in the middle of the week.
  85. What’s wrong with Tiger Woods? He thinks every day is Hump Day.
  86. What is it that the Wednesdays’ dream to be? They only dream and wish of becoming Thursdays.
  87. I rang work and I said “I can’t come in today, I have a wee cough.” The boss said, “You have a wee cough?” I said “Wow, thanks boss, see you next Wednesday!”
  88. Monday – Greg, Tuesday – Ian, Wednesday – Greg, Thursday – Ian, Friday – Greg, Saturday – Ian, Sunday – Greg. There – the Gregorian calendar
  89. What’s Thanos’ favourite holiday? Ash Wednesday
  90. ATTENTION: This afternoon I will attempt to travel back in time and change history. You’ll know I’ve succeeded if Germany loses world war II and Wednesday comes after Tuesday.
  91. What are Wednesdays with no rain called? Parched hump days.

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